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I've developed a schedule on when I'll put up reviews. I'll try to put reviews up every Sunday so if you don't feel like following, just check back then!

Review of 9. Same old song and dance.

9 is the post-apocalyptic story of eight sock puppets that roam earth hoping to survive one day at a time because of a super-robot that took over the world. And then 9 shows up and everything goes bad for 1’s set plan for survival. That’s it. In an hour and nineteen minutes, that’s the plot. So about a half hour of plot basically. The rest is all action and style. Which is the high point because the effects and CGI are so good, but the story is so bad! In fact, every time the story halts, another sock puppet shows up to help move it along. Acting is decent considering the fact that they got all-stars signed in on the cast including Christopher Plummer, Elijah Wood, Jennifer Connelly, John C. Riley, Martian Landau amongst others but you can’t really connect with the characters enough to care that your favorite actor is voicing them One other thing that was really cool was that since they were small creatures, you could see that the items they used to attack the robots were small as well including fish hooks and pins and needles. It’s like they had a microscopic man on set!

The Verdict:
I had high expectations for 9, but in the end all I got was an underwhelming experience. If all you want is cool action, wait to rent it, it isn’t worth wasting thirty dollars on. Instead, go watch the original on YouTube and buy a ticket for District 9. At least then you won’t be disappointed. I give it three destroyed sock puppets out of five. 3/5.

Review of State of Play Batter up!

State of Play is a government conspiracy film about a congressman, a news reporter, and the biggest story of his career. But don't let that deter you! This news reporter is played by Russel Crowe who is as on top of his game as ever. The congressman is played by Drama Ben Affleck. I say that because recently Comedy Ben Affleck has been gracing the screen with less than acceptable performances. (I'm looking at you, Reigndeer Games!) But this time he delivers a great dramatic role that most of us have been waiting a long time for. Now at first, Russel Crowe's character just seems like a sarcastic and charismatic journalist who always gets his story. But as the film progresses a sense of paranoia stars to roam around with him wherever he goes. The only flaw in this idea is that it doesn't progress until the movie is almost over so you get a great gritty feeling but only for about 45 minutes. Rachel McAdams co-stars and I don't have many complaints about her performance besides the fact that she acted like a four-year-old sometimes. Something bad would happen and she would just freak out. The story can be a bit hard to follow so don't go in expecting a breezy film. It's very complicated. Even though you get two semi-stories unfolding at once, Ben Afflecks affair and it even focuses a bit on the fall of the newspaper, the main focus is Russel Crowe entirely focused on his story. Not much of a soundtrack just a few acoustic guitar solos and trumpets as the score. The Verdict:State of Play is great. Plain and simple it's a great time to watch especially if you're bored you can show it to your dad on a lazy Saturday afternoon. All in all, State of Play features some great performances, edge of your seat moments, and an awesome story. Only a few plot holes and ideas that don't fully develop keep it from what it could have been. But that aside, this is a fantastic film that shouldn't be missed.I give State of Play 4 pizza guys on bikes out of 5. 4/5.

Review of Knowing. Who needs originality?

Knowing is the apocalypse story that takes on a new premise of the apocalypse. But it doesn’t really add up. I noted at first that I said “Who needs originality?” While the premise of knowing when disasters happened and are going to happen is new, the ending is so bad you could end up laughing at it. And unfortunately, the best parts of the film were the disaster sequences. Those were pretty memorable and depending on who you are, that could be cool or emotionally scarring. There are also these black rocks that are scattered around the movie, but I never found out what they were for. The visual effects were pretty cool and one explosion at the end is probably one of the better I have seen in my life. The acting is exceptional on Nick Cage’s part with his usual dramatic shtick. But he doesn’t have a good script or other actors to back him up. This film really does prove that even the best actors can’t hold up a movie by themselves. There are even these albino people that are called “The Whisper People” who don’t actually talk, or whisper for that matter, just have two kids translate for them. One other thing I’d like to add is the fact that they used the same actress for two different roles. And that in itself is outright funny due to the fact that these two characters don’t have a lot to do with each other.

The Verdict:
Knowing has a lot of potential but in the end it comes out with two hours of ok footage with a terrible ending. If you have an urge to watch a Cage movie, I’d watch something else, because even though he does well, the rest is just big budget nonsense. All in all, Knowing is an ok movie that you don’t have to see. I give it 3 unnecessary rocks out of 5. 3/5.

Review of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. You can’t tell me nothin’!

Transformers 2 is a good movie but not a good film. If you like explosions, one liners, and a bunch of crazed robots causing the explosions, this is the film for you. If you like story, character development, and good acting, like me, then you won’t like it. I’ll start with the story. I’m not going to lie, it sucks. It’s the same save the world story that’s been done a dozen times over with no new twists or surprises. It is also so fast paced that you never have any time to think about the already forgettable dialogue. Which isn’t terrible but mostly, like I said earlier, full of stupid jokes and one liners. Megan Fox aside, (Who’s acting isn’t going to get her an Oscar anytime soon either,) the acting is outright laughable. The only decent performance in this movie is by Sam Witwickey’s mom, (Shia Lebeouf), who is actually very funny and the only reason to keep me anticipated. I also must admit that Michael Bay has outdone himself this time with special effects and explosions. And when I mean outdone, I mean that there are so many explosions you just get used to them by the end and they actually get boring. Maybe I should say overdone. Oh, I can’t forget the robots themselves. There are so many robots that I was confused by the end of the movie as to who was who. And the movie was three hours long, so they could have provided a little more of a development of the characters rather than have then blow up every five minutes. The ending, don’t get me started on the ending! That was the worst ending of a movie ever, and Wolverine’s ending was pretty bad.

The Verdict
If you’re willing to spend your Saturday night squeezing the last few ounces of stupid juice out of your brain to enjoy this movie then great! Really, you should see this movie, but only do it at 11:00 on a Saturday night. That’s what I did, and I had a blast.
I give this movie 2.5 giant explosions, out of 5. 2.5/5.

Review of District 9. Remarkable.

Every once and a while there’s a movie that totally clears the bar no matter how high you set it. So let me give you a four word review as to save you some time if you don’t want to read the detailed one. Go see it. Now. Well, if that hasn’t convinced you, then read on!

It’s hard to review District 9 and not give away any of the plot. And it is fantastic. But before we get to that I’ll give you a brief history of District 9. This movie is directed by Neil Blomkamp and produced by Peter Jackson. This is actually their low-budget consolation prize for not being able to do the Halo film. Thirty million dollars. And I assume that almost all of that money was spent on the CGI and special effects because there are no big name actors at all and I’m assuming that if anybody knows who the actor who plays main character is someone in a foreign country. There really is only one character that is really acted and that character is named Vikas. Whoever acts him does a fantastic job but really the real capturing point is the story and what he does with it. And the story is what makes this the must see movie of the summer. It switches between documentary and narrative styles which I know bothered some but I thought was a great and fresh new way to film a movie. It also takes itself really seriously. Like it is an actual documentary. They even have a “where are they now” text before the credits. But I’ve never seen a Science Fiction film this good. There’s enough action to keep you at the edge of your seat and an amazing story with an unforgettable twist that keeps you riveted for a long, long, time.

The Verdict: District 9 is the best movie I’ve seen this year and is a classic among Sci-Fi classics. It can get a bit bloody and the camera can get a bit shaky in the first forty-five minutes but the next two hours are the most fun and suspenseful you’ll have this year at the movies this year. I give this five aliens eating cat food out of five. 5/5

Introduction

Hello friends, family, and those new to my movie critique! I made this blog so that people may look at my movie reviews and see if they will enjoy or dislike that movie as well. I will try to update it weekly with reviews of top box office releases as well as classics from long ago. If you have any questions or comments email me at ethan.rosenberg@hotmail.com. Thank you and enjoy!