Review of Dog Day Afternoon. Al Pacino is a bisexual?!

Dog Day Afternoon dramatizes the events that happened on August 22, 1972. Al Pacino portrays John Wortzik, who in the films is named Sonny, as well as other characters that are renamed. So Al Pacino decides one afternoon that he needs money, so he and two of his friends go to rob a bank. But almost immediately one of them drops out. So, It's down to Al Pacino and his pal John Cazale trying to rob said bank. After about fifteen minutes of screen time trying to get money, Al sets a fire on some bank records and the police are notified. After that it all goes downhill for everybody as Sonny tries to figure out what to do. Al Pacino does a great job portraying this character and he interacts well with the supporting cast. Probably one of his best roles. Now I could easily see how this film could have gone in a totally different direction and make a complicated storyline with several points of view on the same event. Thankfully, though, the filmmakers kept it basic and there were no complications with the plot. Also, I went into the film knowing what the motivation for the robbery, but as a viewer, it would have been better to not know because it is all told gradually through individual scenes. The whole film is basically conversations between Pacino and his hostages or the police outside of the bank. If it weren't for the amazing dialogue besides the acting, this movie would have failed miserably. But it didn't. In fact, to me at least, Dog Day Afternoon was a complete success.
The Verdict:
Dog Day Afternoon is great. Great dialogue, great acting, direction, you name it. I wasn't there in Brooklyn on that faithful day in August of 1972, but after seeing this movie, I felt like I was right in the middle of it. I give it five gallons of sweat out of five. 5/5.

Review of The Hurt Locker. Kathryn Bigelow has balls.

The Hurt Locker, directed by Kathryn Bigelow, documents what most
filmmakers are afraid to document. A story about the Iraq War. I
really haven't seen a film about this controversial current event ever
since I started watching movies. Focusing mainly on one company,
Bravo. Jeremy Renner stars as the cocky, rude, and adrenaline-pumped
bomb squad member in Iraq who does everything the wrong way but gets
it done. His squad leader is usually uptight and by the book, so
obviously you'll see some sparks fly. Renner's character is addicted to
the life or death situations and really draws the audience in with his
believable performance. But the real draw for me wasn't the acting but
the fantastic cinematography and directing. Almost every moment was
intense and exciting and I was always at the edge of my seat.

The Verdict: With violence, drama, and even little comedy sprinkled
in, there's enough for everybody here. It even raises a few questions
about the war itself. All in all, The Hurt Locker is a movie that you
really need to see to believe. I give it 4.5 game show sniper kills out of five. 4.5/5.

Review of Black Dynamite. The good ol' days.

Black Dynamite, directed by Scott Sanders and written by and starring
Michael Jai White, is an amazing tribute to all of the Blaxploitation
films from the 70s. Fake facial hair, obnoxious camera angles, and
lots of hilarious over-acting, all form together into a purposefully
generic romp for those who are unfamiliar with the source materials or
just want to revisit the time when filmmaking was much more simple.
I give it 3.5 presidential
scandals behind a presidential scandal out of five. 3.5/5.

Review of Watchmen. Who watches the Watchmen?

Watchmen, directed by Zack Snyder, tells the almost three hour tale of a band of masked vigilantes and their origins. With naked blue nuclear guys, a crazy guy with a cool voice, and a lot of flashbacks, this movie wasn't half bad. A bit long at times but in the end, Zack Snyder crafted a good production. Sometimes, though, there were flashbacks right after an important event happened and I wouldn't know that it actually was a flashback. Taking place during the cold war in an alternate 1980s America where Nixon was elected for three terms, vigilantes were part of society, and it's okay for a giant nuclear blue man not to where any clothing. I mean, seriously. Was it really necessary for a giant blue wang to be hanging out for two and a half hours? Somebody get that guy some boxers.
The Verdict:
Watchmen dragged on for a few hours and it was hard to follow at times, but in the end it was a good experience and there are even a few things that you'll be able to catch that you couldn't if you've only seen it once. I give it four GIANT BLUE WANGS out of five. 4/5.

Review of Mystic River. Looking for a great feel-good film? Good. Now go look somewhere else.

Mystic River, directed by Clint Eastwood, is a sad, but thought provoking film. It was about friendship, and going through tough times. Most of the time while I was watching it i was thinking how this could have been a real story because of the things that I hear on the news. Sean Penn plays a rough and tough guy who's daughter is brutally murdered and his two friends, Tim Robbins and Kevin Bacon, who try to cope with the murder and find the killer. Penn, Robbins, and Bacon all do a great job here, but Tim Robbins stood pout for me because of the way he portrayed such a disturbed character. Eastwood also does well in setting the right mood for each scene, shot entirely on location in Boston, was able to put everything together nicely with the lighting, effects, and lack of music. The lack of music especially hit a mark for me because most of the time a director would put in dramatic music or a sad score for parts where they needed to strike an emotion in the viewer. I like that Eastwood didn't put in a lot of music because it made the movie seem even more real and as if the viewer was experiencing the events themselves.
The Verdict:
With great direction, great jobs done by the leading roles, and even a little bit of an emotional attachment that came along with it, Mystic River was a good, feel-sad film that's worth seeing if you want to make someone rethink their lives or just play a really mean practical joke. I give it four oddly picked names for a person out of five, 4/5.

Review of The Royal Tenenbaums. And I thought my family was messed up!

The Royal Tenenbaums, directed by Wes Anderson, follows Gene Hackman's character, Royal Tenenbaum and his quest to get his dysfunctional family back together after almost twenty years of separation from each other. With an all-star cast including Luke Wilson, Gweneth Paltrow, Owen Wilson, Anglica Huston, Danny Glover, Ben Stiller, and, of course, Gene Hackman. They all do well confusing themselves almost to the point where I could believe this as a true family. I personally thought that Luke Wilson was the best out of the bunch, playing a somewhat demented ex-Tennis Player in love with his (adopted) sister. Gene Hackman did great as well, being acting as if his character were a rebel to his own family, trying to teach themn to have a bit of fun every once and a while. No film is without flaw, though. At times this film felt a bit too melodramatic for its own good. Gweneth Paltrow over-acted her role a bit, being too depressing for the character's personality. I could go on and on naming the pros and cons of this film, but why bother?
The Verdict:
The Royal Tenenbaums, Had a few problems. That, I won't deny. But Wes Anderson puts enough charm into the sadness that seems to overpower the movie to make it a decent dramedy worth a look. I give it 3.5 grandpas riding on a garbage truck out of 5. 3.5/5.

Review of The Usual Suspects. How dare you trick me!

It took a lot of thinking to figure this one out. Directed by Bryan Singer, The Usual Suspects starts by jumping through two periods of time. The present day, and the six weeks leading up to the present day. Don't be discouraged, it fits together nicely and there aren't many plot holes involved. Mostly following Gabriel Byrne in the past and narrated by Kevin Spacey in the present, who does a fantastic job playing a cripple named Verbal in the past and present, has five guys lined up one night and when they're locked away for the evening, decide to pull off one more heist but stick with it for a few more. This is one of the most thrilling and tense film I've ever seen. I was guessing the entire time and when I thought a problem was resolved something else came up and pushed the intensity even higher every time. Acting was phenomenal, especially on Spacey's part. There's Stephen Baldwin, Benicio Del Toro, Kevin Pollack, among others including Spacey and Byrne both of whom I mentioned before, who do a great job communicating with each other and each adding their own flair into the mix. Direction is great, Bryan Singer did an amazing job on keeping things discreet and with a little tilt of the camera, was able to change the whole film. And this films is very, very heavy on small details, and very light on just giving away the things here that mattered most. Even at the end, I had to sit and think for a few minutes to understand what had happened at the very end.
The Verdict:
I know that "ever seen" is a strong phrase to use in a movie critic's vocabulary, but it truly did apply here. This was probably the most gripping, thrilling, intense film I have ever seen. But enough with the adjectives, I'll just get to the point. If you're looking for a good thriller that will keep you at the edge of your seat, look no further, this movie is just for you. With an original script, great dialouge, amazing direction, fantastic acting, you can't go wrong with The Usual Suspects. I give it five I ALMOST CRAPPED MY PANTS! moments out of five. 5/5.